A Medicine I am Addicted to..

Headaches, backaches, foot aches, aching hands, wounds & hurts or any pain – physiological and specially the emotional pains, I was cured, within minutes. It was magical. I didn't knew how it worked and well, I am still clueless about how I used to feel so good and better without actually popping in a tablet or applying some balm. May be it was just my psychological feeling or the reality, but it always worked. I know you might be wondering what is that I am talking about. 

It was on 25th Aug 2014, Mysore, Karnataka that we had a new member in our family. A tiny, fluffy, soft, cute little pup of Golden English Cocker Spaniel. 'Plush' is what I named him. He perfectly justified that word. The kennel where he was born was in Bengaluru and kennel guy had sent him in a locked basket through some traveller. He was 35 days old when he came home. The moment we reached home and I opened his basket; I was in love with him. And the moment I took him into my hands... no words to express. He was as light and soft as a ball of imported fibre cotton and as adorable as the winner of 'Most Adorable' title. Isn't he cute? My schedule for the day and most importantly my 'Life' changed with his presence. I was no more alone at home. I had someone to talk to, play with and pamper. We grew together. Yes, we really grew together. I was becoming more alert, attentive, responsible and happier day by day. A bit crazy, but I was kind of experiencing motherhood with him.

Days, weeks, months passed and he is no more a pup now. He is now into the category of adult dogs. And as the time passed he became my closest friend. He understood me, more than every other person in my life. He understood everything I felt within and does the magic of healing my pain. Whether it was coming and getting cuddled or slowly and lovingly licking my hand while I was caressing his fur or looking at me with those beautiful, expressive eyes with an innocent look or whatever. Yes, we were getting more and more attached to each other. Our day never started until I gave him a good morning hug and a kiss and he never slept until I gave him a good night kiss on his forehead. We watched T.V. together, enjoyed music and used to dance with each other. The bonding we shared had become so deep that I never felt the absence of my parents or brother though I was staying away from them. He took care of me like a mother and was there for me like a support system just like a father and we played, fought, teased and irritated each other crazily like siblings.

There are many instances which are not less than any miracle and where his presence in my life had kept me alive. One such instance was - one day I had high fever and was unable to get up from the bed as was asleep most of the day. I had cough and cold too and couldn't sleep properly. I was alone at home and was missing my mom as there was no one to take care of me or even to give me a glass of water. I was trying hard to sleep and then after a while I realized that some one was patting on my forehead just like mothers do to put their babies to sleep. It was plush. He made sure I fall asleep and the emotional moment was when I woke up in the evening, he was still there, sitting just next to me and was it the ample sleep or him, I don't know but I was feeling better and there was a decrease in my temperature too.

Another instance, Once when I was busy doing some household work, I was walking in hurry from one room to another. I failed to notice that there was water spilled on the floor and slipped. I screamed in pain and was unable to get up as my foot was badly hurt. He broke his chain and came running to me and started pulling my shirt. I shouted at him, I was in pain. I couldn't move my foot. I just continued to sit on the floor and was crying. He licked my tears and started hitting on my sprained foot with his paw. I pushed him away and even slapped him as he was repeatedly hitting on my sprained foot. After some time he went and sat on his bed and a while after that I realized, my pain was gone. Soon I could stand and the first thing I did was going and hug him tight. Never ever in my life, I felt so cared and loved. He wiped every tear of mine in those two years when he was in my life. Sharing my pain to him and having long and real long conversations with him have always kept my heart light and happy. Yes, what they say is true, you can never have any one as loyal as a dog in your life. Their love is unconditional. They are selfless. And they will never give up on you even if you do. A dog never leaves his master, but a human can.

How I wish the attachments in our lives could be deleted as easily as our mail attachments. "Plush babu, I miss you. I miss you like I miss myself. I miss being taken care of and being loved. Without you I feel incomplete and lonely. I don't know where you are but you are for sure in my heart and a million memories I have cherished. I miss baking cake for your birthday and celebrating this day how we used to. I wish I could just have you back. If I am asked to define you in a word, 'Happiness' is what I'll choose to describe you. I really love you. Wish you a very Happy Second Birthday my baby boo." 

P.S. There is a fact that not everyone likes to have a pet or a dog as a pet. You may not like too. But then look around, you'll definitely have someone who loves you unconditionally and is always there for you. And someone who can just listen to you for hours without judging you. And do you know who understands you completely? It's you. Love yourself, believe in yourself and stand by yourself. No one will ever feel the same intensity of pain or happiness as you do. Just like you can't squeeze out orange juice or lemon juice from a tomato, you can't give happiness to others until you are happy. What resides within is what comes out. Find your happiness or rather find your 'Plush'.

Remember?

#WLOO (We Live Only Once)

Preneeja Peelukhana

The Scar!

"Ouch!" she screamed, when I touched her cheek. There was a scar.. a not so deep and old one.

"Does it still ache? Isn't it an old and healed one ?" I asked her.

"It hurts. It reminds me of my dad. It really hurts.." she said.

Not knowing how to react I just took her into my arms and she began to cry. Yeah, what else could have been expected?

Some where in the mid of September 2012, my friends and I decided to visit a juvenile home as suggested by our lecturer. We reached there with loads of excitement bagged in and a bit of hesitation and nervousness because it was our first experience and we were clueless about what to talk to the girls there. We went in and thought of exploring that place. It was just then she caught my attention.

"Aww she's so cute" was my reaction looking at her. I saw a very cute, fair, doll like girl sitting under a tree all alone. She was young, very young in fact when I met her. She aged 10 back then.

I went to her, sat beside and asked whats her name. She looked away. May be she was frightened I thought. I made a few attempts to talk to her but being unsuccessful in all the attempts, I decided to go and sit right in front of her.

"Please don't tell my dad that I am here" she said with moistened eyes and hid her face with her hands. "I don't know your dad. Please don't be scared. Trust me." I kept saying this for a several times and then she finally took her hands off her face. Horrified I was at that very moment to see such a big cut mark on her cheek. It was as long as the distance from her right ear to chin.

I insisted her to speak up and recollecting her story still gives me goosebumps.

She was their only daughter and was from a general middle class like most of us. "It was a happy family of three and everything was going great until.." she paused. It took a while for her to hold back the tears and speak again.

Her mom had gone to her grandmom's place for a week leaving her at home with her dad. She couldn't go with her mom as she had her half yearly exams from the next day. That night her dad came home drunk and she saw an entirely different side of him. One of his friends had accompanied him to his home. They took her to the bed room, tore her clothes, raped her violently. He slashed her cheek and hit her every time she tried to defend her self or screamed in pain. It continued for next four days. She bled heavily, she was injured. She was traumatized and helpless. She was locked in a room and was used as a sex object by her father and his friend.

One day just when her dad was done acquiring pleasure, the door bell rang and her dad went to open the door and left it open and fell asleep as he was totally drunk. God's grace, she could escape and later was rescued. Though her physical hurts were healed, they formed scars on her whole body and heart especially for ever. She was 6 years old when she became a victim of all this.

I was blank. I couldn't say anything but hug her tight. She cried and cried but after a while she stopped. She smiled, she thanked, she said she felt very safe and relieved after so many years.

It made my day. I couldn't erase her past but at least could make her smile. You too can.

Share someone's pain and the amount of happiness we get by making someone smile is huge and remains unexplainable. Spread the love, spread the smiles! Live for the ones who need you.

Happy Living :)

#WLOO

An Open Secret!

Tears rolled down her eyes when I asked her 'When did it all start?'

Did it start in her toddler-hood when she was forced to get her ears pierced??

Or did it start when she had to sacrifice a lot of things for her younger siblings?

What was it? Was is only the physical pain or something else too?

Yes, I was talking to a woman, the strongest one ever. Having a conversation about food, cooking, fashion, marriage etc. I asked her "You are 50 now, How was your journey so far?"

There was a lot of silence on her face and pain in her eyes. After a while she replied, "It was painful but beautiful.." Painful yet beautiful?? How? And the reply she gave me still gives me goosebumps. Many things she told and a few, I couldn't believe.

She being the eldest in her family had to sacrifice many things for her younger ones, killing her ambitions and not studying further because her parents couldn't afford, leaving her family and moving away to a different state after getting married and she had to bear a lot of physical pain like forced piercing, menstruation, penetrations, deliveries that too normal ones both the times and so on... So common in every female's life right?

When she started explaining about each of that physical and emotional pain, I was just wondering is it really that painful but later I was convinced because I being a female have experienced a few of them too. These being common, What was it that made her the strongest? Its the willingness to live and having the courage of bluffing her death. She fought for her life and over came her demise. Being attacked by cancer twice, she managed to survive. She had an option of not getting treated and not losing her body parts and just leave because going through its treatment is much more painful than death. The chemotherapy not only vanishes that person's beauty but also gives numerous side effects for which she'll have to suffer through out.

'She' or 'Her' here doesn't refer just to this lady but to the millions of other women around us including my mom. Yes, its about her. It was for us, my brother and me that she wanted to live. The fear of who'll take care of her husband and children after her gave her the strength of fighting that evil. I still remember how one day after losing all her beautiful , thick, black, long hair including her eye brows she asked me , "Am I not looking beautiful?" I couldn't reply..I just hugged her tight. She looked beautiful. That smile and spark in her eyes.. as elegant and simple as she always was. It was tough but she smiled through out to give us the strength. There is a lot more that she has faced and I have just seen, not felt.

It was almost an hour that we were conversing and at the end I managed to ask "Then how come Beautiful?" and she replied, "Pains vanish, Problems are solved and Everything else is Beautiful."

She made me realize - 'We CAN only if WE want to' and 'We are our biggest Strength'

True! Problems are common, Pain is natural, In the world we live in, failures are obvious.

You might have thousands of reasons to die but just one small reason can keep you alive.

Find your reason and lead your Life!

#WLOO ( we live only once)

A Page from My Diary...

It was just a regular day... a regular weekday. My alarm was set at 5.00 A.M. It started ringing loud in my ears and like every other day I woke up thinking "why does my college start so soon?". Yeah, it used to start at 7.30 A.M. and for which I had to leave home by 6.30 or 6.45 A.M. So as I already woke up, now I got to get ready, have something, clean my bike and off to college.

It used to be a great, pleasant and refreshing early morning ride of 16 km most of the days. Experiencing the rising sun in freezing winter mornings, the freshness and blossoms of spring, and morning drizzles of monsoon felt awesome, or actually superlative of awesome. Well, in summer we never had college. It used to start from July and end by Feb end. So couldn't experience how summer morning rides felt..ha ha..

On an usual monsoon morning, I woke up, got ready, had my breakfast, cleaned my bike and started my journey. I traveled around 4.5 km and stopped no where. Now there was a signal coming and I had to reduce my speed and put a break. Then ,Oh My God! breaks failed. One wasn't working from the previous week and the second one broke just when I pressed it. There were a few things which took place in the next few seconds. I pressed the break, it broke, the roads were wet, signal turned red and other vehicles were stopping. My bike lost its balance and started to skid. It was as if I was doing an action scene for some movie.

It continued to skid, I lost my balance, there was a truck coming just behind me and everything was blank. Everything was actually blank and black when I opened my eyes. It was for a moment I opened my eyes and saw the truck just a centimeter away and blank again. Yes, I was under it.

I would call it a miracle if I am alive today. The next time I opened my eyes was when I felt some hard slaps on my cheeks. "OH! I AM ALIVE" was the first thing that sprouted in my semi-conscious mind.

I opened my eyes and saw some people gathered around me. They asked some hundred questions in a span of one minute ( well, that is what I felt at that moment). I was curious to know what happened after everything became blank and asked what happened and was told that I just escaped from being crushed down by the truck. That noble truck driver had given a sudden break at a very right moment and though I almost went below it, just before its huge front tyres got on me, the truck stopped.

Okay, cool! I am alive. Though my hands and legs got badly scratched, hurt, wounded, injured or whatever it is and I was terribly bleeding, I was alive. The amount of joy that feeling gave me is still immeasurable and can't be put into words. I gathered myself, came to full conscious, took my slightly damaged bike and some how headed back to my home. I reached home, mom was just leaving to her office. Before she could ask what happened, I told her and so on.

Other than all these things, there was something else happening. That something was happening in the background, in my mind. There was a rush of thoughts. I felt overloaded and the scariest of those thoughts was "What if I died?". There were a lot of things I wanted to do. There were a few things that I kept postponing. I skipped those saying I'll do it tomorrow. But what if there is no tomorrow?

There were a few commitments, a few promises, a few people whom I owed a 'Sorry', a few whom I owed a heart felt 'Thank you'.

This experience was worst of all but had given me something that I always needed. I learned a lot, realized life can end at any moment. Death can embrace you any time. And because it won't tell us before coming, waiting for it all the days when we are alive would be foolishness. Yes, we know we should live our life but "How?" is my question. No, I don't need your answer because I have mine.  So, just sit back and ask yourself how you wanna live and live for yourself.

#WLOO ( we live only once)

Education? What is it?

‘Education’ a single word with a huge and deep meaning. Education is what makes us a better person. Often people think that studying and bagging in a few degrees makes them educated but no, it makes them literate but not educated. Education in my opinion, is that source which develops us as a person i.e. overall development and helps us deal with our life in a better way. And many times, we find a person who is highly qualified but lacks proper education, fails to be successful. Hence, education is important and more than that a ‘good’ education is important.

What is ‘Good’ Education? Where does it come from?

It comes from a good environment which includes our school, college or any institution to which we belong and of course from our parents who are our first teachers. It also comes to us from our culture, our religion, our lifestyle and thus everything around us effects everything within us. 

In changing times and with increasing challenges, the need and importance of education is greater and needs to constantly develop. There are a large number of people who are working hard to make the education system excellent and better day by day. Promoting excellence in education is the need of the hour and the most important contribution of people working towards excellence in education is to make sure they understand how to do it, work on the student teacher relationship, provide education after understanding the learning style and ability of the students. Imbibing certain qualities in people right from their childhood such as making the most of the available time, absorbing what’s been taught, using the knowledge in the right place at the right time, also having an understanding of how to do it so that the importance of education is understood and prioritized at every step of life. Every parent, teacher, student, school and institution together make it a system and each one associated has the responsibility of making it better with their skills, hard work, and zeal including constantly learning and adapting to new techniques.

Promoting excellence in education makes it more qualitative and smoothens the progress of the system itself. By adapting new teaching techniques, using innovative and interactive methods, learning can be made more interesting and thus more long lasting. This allows us to teach more and them to learn more, thus proving that only constant learning can create excellence in education.

Education is a not a one-time process, we can learn from anything and anyone around us. When we become truly able to learn from situations around us, then the process of growth becomes clear and the path to wisdom appears. Learning is a lifelong process, but it all starts with a thought "I want to learn". They say, 'life is the best teacher', true that, it does teach us the best of lessons. Also, everyone in our life is a teacher. There is a lot to learn from our elders and their experiences, lot to learn from our younger generation, a lot to learn from animals and it goes on.

Imagine there is a fisherman who have spent his entire life in the middle of a sea for earning his livelihood through fishing and there is a professor with multiple Ph. Ds. who have spent his entire life studying and researching about oceans and seas. Whom do you think will survive a storm if they are stuck in the middle of a sea? One has purely practical knowledge about waters, waves, handling climatic changes etc. while the other one has only theoretical knowledge about the same. Because learning something sitting in a room and learning the same on the field are different exposures. But to actually survive a storm may be both the fisherman and the professor need each other and that’s the same relation between education and knowledge. Both can exist without each other but the combination of both will definitely help survive.

To understand the difference between uneducated and educated people, it is necessary to know the difference between knowledge and half knowledge, to understand the difference between being a literate and being educated, to understand the difference between having knowledge and having information about something. Those who think they are educated and stop learning have incomplete knowledge and this is worse than having no knowledge. A person who is uneducated will be willing to listen and understand, making it appear that uneducated people are willing to learn more, but that is only when those who are literate, choose not to learn further.

Also, the most impressionable ages in the life of a person, are the ones between 4 and 17, and this is where the education (not books and exams), comes in the form of parents, grandparents, friends, classmates, teachers and everyone around. This is where values can be taught, and made to last a lifetime. Sports, playing, celebrating festivals, listening to stories, asking questions, being able to apply the lessons taught at school in real life i.e. learning in experimental, experiential and practical manner like learning science through cooking or by doing simple household chores, taking tuition to juniors, these all have an impact in the future of the child.

Many years we lived till now, a lot we learned - personally & professionally, what next? Share your knowledge. Knowledge is something like the more we share the more we get. Let us care and share and see the wonders happen.

“To get the best, give the best”

WE LIVE ONLY ONCE #WLOO

-Preneeja Peelukhana

How it all started..

It was a few years back, when I was just done with my first year of graduation i.e. somewhere in June 2011 that it all happened. We shifted to a new area, to a new home. A lot of excitement we had and with the same feel we started setting up our new home. The cartons were being opened by my parents,one by one, while my younger brother and I were busy searching for the T.V. remote (the T.V. was just installed and we badly wanted to switch it on and watch our favorite show) and my mom called us..she said, "Here is the carton of your games and a few toys. What do you wanna do with these? Keep them or you want me to dispose them?" For that we said we can dispose them as we no longer used play with them.

Finally, by evening the whole house was set and we sat at the dining table for our first dinner. Eating and talking are done simultaneously specially while having dinner so it was then there came a discussion of how and when to dispose all those things that were no longer in use. For most of that collected stuff being 'Our' stuff like games,toys,books, clothes, lunch boxes, pencil boxes, other stationary, we decided an orphanage would be the best choice. 

Next day, I opened my dad's laptop and started searching for orphanages in google. To my luck, the first orphanage itself in that list was located very near to our place like some 10 minutes away. I took the contact details and asked my mom to call them and ask the details like do they take all these things if we give? when can we go? where is it exactly? etc. As soon as she dropped the call she asked us to get ready so that we can start as soon as possible.

We reached there and I was the first person to get down of the car. That place and its environment amazed me. We unloaded all the stuff from our car and carried them to their office. We handed over all of that to a lady there and started talking to the head of that orphanage. He told us that it was a home for street children and this particular branch was meant only for boys.

 As the conversation of my parents and that person extended for a little long, my brother and I went out of that room to explore. It was not even 5 minutes since I left that room that my dad called me in. They introduced me, "She is our daughter, Preneeja, She is doing her Grad. in Psychology.." and before my parents could complete the whole thing , that person - Father of that Orphanage asked me to sit and eventually we got into a conversation all about psychology, kids etc. Meanwhile there came two kids Raju and Rajesh. Raju was 2 and a half yrs and Rajesh was 4 yrs old. They were the youngest kids there told the father.

RAJU! :')

              I called Raju, he came and straight away slept on my lap. I thought okay , little kid , let him sleep and continued my conversation with father and started caressing Raju's hair. After almost an hour , when our conversation ended, I asked him to get up so that we can leave. I stood and started to walk when that little boy Raju held my hand tight and said 

RAJU :)

(with a lot of innocence on his face, heaviness in his voice , tears in his eyes) "Akka (sister in telugu), no one ever made me sleep like this. Will you come again? When will you come?" That moment moved me, his words straight away pierced my heart, my eyes were moistened and I realized how lucky I was to have my parents.

I replied, "Raju, I'll come soon, and come whenever possible" and left. 

               As soon as we came home I shared this experience with a few of my friends and started going there from the very next weekend. Who ever could join used to come and there were times when I went alone and in a very less time it became my second home. Many birthdays of my friends, family and mine we celebrated there and every festival specially New Years, Christmas, Rakshabandhan, those kids and I celebrated together. Now its almost a relation of 5 years that I have with them and hundreds of memories but the memory that is still so fresh in my mind is the day I met Raju, the day I met them. They made me realize many things, They made me a better person. 

               Now I live in a different state, a different city but yeah I see many like them. There are a lot of Rajus around us who aren't as lucky as us. Who need just love and affection. I know many people who do charities, but more than a monetary help they need a satisfaction, a feeling that they are not alone. Every child in every orphanage has a story.. a sad story.. when they share it with us they feel better. Giving a shoulder to a person in pain is the best and most satisfying thing one can do. Accepting our life for what it is and trying to make it better and staying happy with all that we have is what I learned from them. Even if you are alone, You can still be happy if you want is what they made me realize. They being in an unimaginably miserable condition, always smiled. They inspire me, they made me stronger. 

For what they taught me, I'll always be thankful and the last thing - experience that happiness and satisfaction at least once before you die. Life can be long, life can be short but one inevitable thing about life is that, we have it only once.

#WLOO! (we live only once)

- Preneeja Peelukhana

RAJU, RAJESH AND AVI

LOVE :)